'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
My vagina is officially offended.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize