I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
My balls are so social today.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
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