Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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