I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Randomize
