Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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