So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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