She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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