Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
