So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
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