I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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