taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize