Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Randomize