Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
