You can't special order awesome
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
