Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
