Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
why do cheetos always look like penises
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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