I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Randomize