Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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