People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Randomize