Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
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