dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
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