it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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