Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
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