Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
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