New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
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