that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
