Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
How's work?
Spinning.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
