He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
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