I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
So gin and wine won't be happening again
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
Randomize
