apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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