You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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