Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
