well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Randomize
