Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Randomize
