you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
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