Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize