I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Randomize
