STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
did you just send me my own nude
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize