What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Randomize
