Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
its not stalking. its research.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize