she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
