I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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