Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize