she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize