Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
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