so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Randomize