Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
