Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
I wish you could order shots online.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
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