My liver just broke up with me...
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
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