also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
someone owes me an orgasm
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
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