I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
